Bev's Blog

Do you battle a relentless inner critic? Terry Real explains why the idea that harshness is necessary for excellence is utter nonsense!. This article dives into the concept of the Adaptive Child who's running your relationship and teaches you how to replace self-loathing with loving firmness. Read the full article, Learning to Live a Non-Viole...

Hearing more about Relational Life Therapy (RLT) recently?  You're not alone. RLT and its founder, Terry Real, LICSW have been getting some well-deserved attention in the media lately. I'm honored and thrilled to share this recent headline shared by the Relational Life Foundation. Why Boys and Men Are Floundering According to the Relation...

"How I Learned that the Problem in My Marriage was Me!" by Daniel Oppenheimer is a brave and beautifully presented account of someone's personal experience working with Terry Real, LICSW, a masterful couples therapist and director of the Relational Life Foundation. This piece truly illuminates the powerful impact of his approach.

Terry Real, LICSW Chair and President of the Relational Life Foundation Board of Directors and the RLT approach are showing up more and more in the media — and for good reason. They offer grounded, transformative insights into intimacy, healthy masculinity, and the real work of healing relationships. One great example is this recent New York Times ...

In the journey of love and relationships, mindfulness plays a crucial role in fostering deep emotional connection and understanding. Inspired by the work of renowned therapist Terry Real, relational mindfulness encourages presence, empathy, and emotional regulation in our interactions with loved ones. By being fully attuned to our partners, we can ...

Have you ever been completely baffled by how your partner sees a situation so differently from you? Do you sometimes feel frustrated that they don't want the same things or approach problems the same way? You're not alone! As humans, we're wired to believe that others think like we do, value what we value, and should naturally be on the same page. ...

Some couples approach therapy hoping that the therapist will fix their "problematic" partner. Once the partner gets it and changes, all the relationship problems will be solved. Yeah right! Here's the deal! You can't change your partner and your partner can't change you. You can, however, influence each other. Becoming a kinder and more loving part...

Changing your perspective on a situation, will change your life! This is what happened to my client O. when through sharing his challenges in coaching sessions, he was able to find clarity and calm through a new way of viewing his circumstances. You see, it's never the situation that's at fault. It's the way you choose to view it. In life, nothing ...

Deep and meaningful relationships play a vital role in overall well-being. Research has proven that people with supportive and rewarding relationships have better overall mental health. An informative perspective on thriving through relationships, emphasizes two types of support that relationships can provide. What is 'thriving'? Relationships help...

Aviva Belfer is an enhancer of possibilities. She always asks, what more can we do? She invites people to step out of their story and to see who they are. "When we buy into our stories, we close off seeing what additional possibilities are available to us." she says. "When we believe in our thoughts, when we tell ourselves a story, we suffer. 'My h...

Faced with a difficult, stressful situation, relationship-related, your default feeling may be of defeat. Sometimes we give up the minute we see a hurdle in our path. The message is emphatically you can't ever be good enough. How can you confront and find ways of solving problems instead of always seeing them as insurmountable obstructions to any f...

When speaking to Gila Green about her author journey I was inspired by her deep seated belief in her "inner compass" that has "directed" and guided her to produce several poignantly written and published books. Her journey was navigated by knowing clearly what her destination was. She knew what she wanted and began taking the necessary steps to get...

 Living intentionally requires clarity. When you are clear about what makes you happy, healthy, loving and fabulous, you become happy, healthy, loving and fabulous. When S. worked with me she expressed that becoming clear on what really mattered to her and getting rid of what really didn't, made her life a lot easier. Becoming clearer requires...

"When you come from a very clear place , you can use your skills from all your life experiences to best deal with any challenge at hand. " This is how Beverly Chimes opened her wisdom share with me almost 2 years ago.It was wise then and it still holds true for today. Beverly believes that understanding yourself will guide you no matter where you a...

 Being kind is an interpersonal skill that strengthens your relationships and sense of satisfaction with life. "Bev being kind, friendly, generous, and considerate in our sessions, demonstrated the powerful impact of courage and strength." This is how S. experienced our work together. Science has shown that devoting resources to others, rather...

"Listening to your body is a link in the chain of change and healing." These are wise words offered to me in my WiSh (Wisdom Share) Series with Bev Liebson about the power of taking the time to notice what we feel in our bodies. So much of the time the answers to our health challenges are within, but we don't always know how to read the signs and r...

 Finding her purpose was more than just a cliché for my client T. When we began working together she was determined to live a happier, healthier and more meaningful life. Why Do You Need a Sense of Purpose? Feeling like what you do is worthwhile is directly connected to longevity and well-being. With all of the benefits, it's clear that it's i...

Helping others believe in themselves helps us notice the many qualities they have which can help them attain their goals as well as invite them to work together with us to help us attain ours. Theodore Roosevelt said, "Believe you can, and you are halfway there." Very often that belief comes from a supportive circle of family and friends. We are wi...

Creating the life you want to live is a journey, an adventure, and completely possible. Take action to create a beautiful life aligned with your true self. Stacie Walker put it to me so beautifully, "You don't only have to do it one way. It must match your vision, your mission and your personality. It must feel good for you." When you're aligned wi...

 I'm excited to share a really powerful conversation I had with Ralph Brogden about "building the business you want so that you can live the life you want." I think this message is as relevant now as it was when we spoke over a year ago. Ralph expresses himself so clearly and obviously walks his talk when it comes to his teachings. He is a mas...