One of the most powerful tools in the relational arsenal is a map of how to think of yourself as well as your partner in your ongoing minute-to-minute current relationship. Healthy Self-Esteem Self-esteem means that I hold myself in esteem. I recognize my intrinsic value as a human being. Within the circle of health, I have a warm regard for myself...
Bev's Blog
Together we can heal in our relationships. We find somebody, we fall in love. Boom we feel amazing! We're really feeling that this perfect person is going to complete us. This person is going to soothe what needs soothing and heal what needs healing. I am going to get from this person what I didn't get as a child. That's what falling in love means....
Whenever you are face to face with a partner who is in a state of upset and hurt, you have one goal, which is to help them come back into harmony with you. Back into closeness. Even in the heat of the moment, remember that the person you're speaking to is someone you care about. And the reason you're speaking is to make things better. The subtext u...
Beverly Joy Ehrlich is a Relationship Coach. She lives in Israel with her husband, their children, and grandchildren. Beverly and her husband moved to Israel from Cape town, South Africa a year after getting married, almost 40 years ago. Beverly loves the outdoors in Israel. She has participated in a 4 km charity swim in Lake Kinneret, has hiked pa...
How do we heal, grow, and thrive as people? I firmly believe it is in relationship. We are wired for connection. Who we are is shaped by our relationships. This means that when it comes to thriving and developing in a healthy and vigorous way, the quality of our relationships matters. All Smiles! Ed Tronick observed that our culture idealizes harmo...
Why is it so painfully difficult for people who love each other to give their partner what they want and in return get their needs met too? What behaviors sabotage and derail our good intentions? Real intimacy requires a constant journey from disruption to repair. According to Terry Real, master couple and family therapist, and author of the ...
Let me ask you something. Have you ever felt like you don't recognize your behavior or you can't believe what you just said? Sound familiar? You start to say something that really isn't the best thing to say at that moment. In fact, it's really going to get you into trouble. It's definitely not going to get you closer to the person you're speaking ...
Do you feel like you and your partner keep repeating the same behaviors and you just can't shift things? Your relationship doesn't have to be a constant struggle or a complete disconnect. Intimate relationships aren't only about falling in love, they're about how to stay in love long-term. The problem is that when our partner triggers us, our skill...
"I am so shocked and my feelings so hurt that you would even think that of me!" If you're boundaryless and thin-skinned, you take in everything that's said to you. In a healthy relationship, you understand that other people think whatever they think about you. If it's not true, it's not true. It goes splat on the outside of your boundary; you don't...
Have you ever questioned whether the person you're in love with is capable of making you happy? Well, how is that working out for you? The marriage we want is like the body we want-flawless!! Relationships are not perfect! Real relationships are the collision of your partner's imperfections with your flaws. How you manage that, is key to your healt...
